Letting Jesus Take the Lead

What does it look like to choose trust over control?

Love,

I hope your Thanksgiving brought you peace and calm and that you were surrounded by people who support you and remind you that you’re loved.

This morning God led me to Isaiah 65, and it opened my eyes again to how deeply our choices matter. What you worship shapes your destiny, and God makes a clear distinction between those who chase their own way and those who rest in Him. It was the reminder I needed to keep my heart aligned with His will and the encouragement to trust that restoration and newness come when we hold onto Him.

The song Whatcha Say has been standing out to me these past few days, and it’s made me reflect on some things that I felt necessary to share. God sees how you treat His daughters, whether you realize that or not. He sees the women you entertained with no real intention, the ones you pursued out of lust, the ones you ghosted, the ones you misled while doing God’s work, and the hearts that were wounded because of mixed signals and emotional games. He also sees when you use the attention of other women to manipulate or hurt the one woman you actually care about. It’s deeply concerning, and it makes it impossible for me to trust you as you are now.

You need to bring all of this before God, repent, and make things right with Him. How can He entrust you with one of His daughters if you can’t value or protect their hearts? Guarding a woman’s heart is not optional. It is foundational to being a godly man, especially one who desires to be a husband. If you’re not practicing that as a single man, it will only become more challenging once you’re married.

There is no point praying for a Proverbs 31 woman if you are not allowing God to shape you into the man who can actually receive her. And I’m not saying all of this just for me, but for all my sisters in Christ. I genuinely hope you reconsider how you’ve been treating the women God places in your life.

These men bring up some really good points in this video and this one.

Even though I barely have enough money to buy food right now, I don’t care about your money. I don’t care about your success, your influence, or how attractive you are. None of that matters if you can’t be loyal, and I can’t trust you.

I’m done tolerating, chasing, or appeasing men who think it’s acceptable to take advantage of me physically, verbally, emotionally, or spiritually. It’s all the same, and I know God has better for me.

Talking about this makes me uncomfortable, but I care about you enough to be honest. I want the best for you, and I need you to know that it’s not going to successfully work with me (or with any woman of God) if these patterns continue.

All we want is a loyal man we can trust to lead, who knows how to communicate with respect, and who will do everything he can to guard our hearts, not break them.

So for now, the offer is still on the table for anyone who feels ready to step into that role as my king. As for the men in my past, God has made it clear they’re not ready. If they ever want access to my life again, they will have to let God transform them into true men of God and show (through their actions) that they can honor me as a daughter of the Most High.

I can’t be with a man who carries a Jezebel spirit or with a man who tolerates it like Ahab. I know it’s hard, but you can’t save someone who is pulling you away from God. We have to be discerning and wise about who we let close to us. All you can do is surrender them to Him, because He knows exactly what they need. I’m on a mission to break the influence of the Jezebel spirit, and I need a man with the humility, strength, and courage to grow and rise higher with me.

During nap time this afternoon, we sat on my parents’ deck by the water and read ’Twas the Night Before Christmas. As we were reading, I found myself thinking about the character of Santa (or Saint Nick as he’s called in the story). I was reflecting on how easily he becomes one of the biggest distractions and deceptions of Christmas. He’s this figure who slips in and out during the night, unseen and unheard, leaving behind material gifts that never truly satisfy. Meanwhile, the real meaning of Christmas is the birth of Jesus — the child whom wise men found by following a star, and the One who would grow up to lead us out of darkness and into His light. It was a good reminder that not everything we’re told or marketed about this season is rooted in truth.

In the middle of the story, this huge flock of mergansers swam by on the water. There were probably over a hundred of them! It was wild, but honestly really cool to see. A bit later on, some orca sighting boats were lingering right in front of the deck, but unfortunately we didn’t end up seeing any whales.

Just to be clear, the only interaction I’ve had with anyone of the opposite sex in recent months was two texts and a single phone call with a friend’s boyfriend’s son. Other than that (and aside from my dad and brother), I haven’t been talking to anyone. So if anyone is suggesting otherwise, please stop. Right now, my inner circle is limited to my family.

And to be completely honest, I’ve specifically asked God to guard me from ungodly or deceitful men. So unless you’re willing to walk through His refining fire and let Him transform you from the inside out, please leave me alone.

If you’re a man and you message me about anything that isn’t strictly professional or related to ministry, I’ll respond with a standard message along with a referral to a men’s group or ministry that can support you. And if you continue reaching out after that, you will be blocked, so please don’t expect me to read any further messages.

This evening I gave the boys a haircut. I was a little nervous to try it myself, but I learned some fade and blending techniques, and I’m actually really proud of how it turned out. They both look so handsome.

While I was making dinner, our youngest kept mentioning his belly button, and it reminded me of when he was just a few weeks old and had an umbilical granuloma. There was a little growth that kept his belly button from closing properly. I looked into it back then, and after applying a little salt to the spot, it dried up, fell off, and his belly button healed perfectly. Anyway, a bit of a random tangent, but I thought you might find it interesting.

In the morning my mom is going to watch the boys for a bit so I can go for a run and have some quiet time to myself. Then in the afternoon we’re heading to a wreath-making event in town, which should be really fun. And after the boys go to bed, I’m planning to bake a cake and wrap some gifts for a joint celebration we’re having on Sunday.

I know it’s hard to see sometimes, but everything really is going according to God’s plan. He’s in control, so don’t be discouraged. Take the time you need to focus on yourself. God will bring clarity when it’s time and will use all of this for your good and His glory. As for me, I need to take some time to heal, stay focused on the assignment He’s given me, and go my own way for a bit.

God led me to Jonah 4 tonight, and it reminded me how important self-forgiveness truly is. Jonah struggled to receive the same mercy God was freely giving, and it made me realize how often we do the same with ourselves.

Don’t pay attention to any negativity or nonsense being said. You’re going to come out of this storm better, stronger, healthier, and walking in even greater spiritual authority.

My prayer is that we keep Jesus at the very center of everything, because that’s the only thing that really matters. His Kingdom come, His will be done.

With love, Jeanie

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” — Proverbs 3:5-6